Understanding different ways.

When I went to a grocery store in Germany I didn’t think twice about the person behind me, pushing the shopping cart against my legs. It was annoying, but to me these people were merely eager to get to the cash register. I wondered why my mom wouldn’t accept this as a fact: she complained how this would never happen in the States, how “pushy” they were and how impolite it was. To me this was just the way it was.

Once a week my mom shops in the “Commissary” on the American military base. She says she needs a “break”. I used to take my friends because we’d get excited about skittles, roll ups and peanut butter cups but never understood the “break thing”. I did notice, however that people in line were very friendly and even (wow) let you get in front of them – but again, to me this was just the way it was.

I have been fortunate to grow up in “two worlds” and I didn’t understand all the talk about the advantages of knowing about two different cultures. I used to think you could always learn the language, read about traditions and adapt to the life style. But as my friends got older (speaking English very well) I noticed that they were having trouble communicating with the Americans on base, for example. How do you respond to “How are you doing today?” or to “Can I help you?” ? If you have grown up in the States you get used to it. Yes, there are equivalent phrases in the German language but they are used in a different and much less common form. In general (and I don’t like to generalize when it comes to peoples or national identities) a German would suspiciously think “Why would this stranger want to know how I’m doing?” – critical.

I have spent a little more than 4 months in the US. I think I know how to respond to a “How are you today?” rather well and I have been taken to “unGerman” places such as IHOP at 2 am in the morning. There were many new things I learned about the “way of life” on this side of the ocean and I am confident that after a while things will level off – but only because I’ve had my parents’ (American) schooling in previous years. My German friends here at Mary Wash have often told me in wonderment about what this “American” had done or said – and most of the time I had to laugh, remembering that this was one of the things I had labeled “this is just the way it is”. But looking at it from a German point of view it did seem strange – or at least different.

I find all of this very interesting to observe. But looking back I realize I could not understand the different mentalities had I not “accepted things just as they are”. If I view the “German” from an American perspective – he could be considered to be rude. But he really isn’t – they only interact in a different way. And I have only come to this conclusion by observing the way I talk and act when among Americans compared to the way I behave when amongst Germans.

What hand do you hold your fork in when you eat? If in the right hand, you will be considered impolite and almost ignorant. And eating together, one will never start unless everyone has, too. Even if only at a cafeteria or fast food place. Now these are only a few of many examples of Germany – a country comparable to the US. It takes a very long time to fully understand a different country’s people. I think this is one of the things that globalization (of cultures) will never achieve. I hope it won’t support and streangthen prejudices and stereotypes.

~ by anyaka86 on November 30, 2006.